ABA Grammar

[ABARedWhiteBlue]

Thought it would be best to merge the grammar-challenged to one thread. Today's submission:
The Maywood Buzz
http://www.hometeamsonline.com/visit/?u ... etball&t=c

MAYWOOD BUZZ TO BATTLE TEAM HOOPLOVE
IN FIRST GAME OF ABA SPL

Maywood, CA - (August 3rd, 2007) - The Maywood Buzz will be squaring off against Team HoopLove in the first game of the ABA Summer League on Saturday, August 4th, 2007 at the Maywood Activity Center. "I don't in no way see this as just another game on the schedule. I see this as a little family war brewing" says Buzz GM Burrel Lee III. "Team HoopLove beat us in the Championship Game of our Memorial Day Weekend Tournament and we have a little score to settle" added Lee.

See Team HoopLove who have 5 Buzz players from 2006-2007 and the teams equipment manager is sort of an offspring of the Buzz. "We beat the Buzz in there Home Gym, on their court and in their tournament, I do believe they will leave it all on the court" says HoopLove/Buzz PG and coach Jonathan Davis. "I know Burrel didnt have all his guns and now he does, so this will be a great game" Davis added.

Also we had a schedule mix up with announcer and he cant make it out until the start of next week. So we will begin to broadcast games on Tuesday, August 7th. We are also working on putting highlights on the website.

Stay locked into http://www.hometeamsonline.com/abaspl for up to the minute stats, video and stories. Also player bio's, photos and the play of the day.

I guess Corning's lawn care kid has a new job...

Big surprise - there are no stats, but there are scores, so that's something, I suppose.

And, if it is the ABA Summer League, why is there only one ABA team involved?

[Paul S]

Team Hooplove vs The Lady Takers?

Anyways I digress.

Stay locked into http://www.hometeamsonline.com/abaspl for up to the minute stats, video and stories. Also player bio's, photos and the play of the day

I've never seen any stats, any video and any stories on any teams site. I've never even seen the league standings at the ABA site.

I can't wait for the bio's too........

BIO
Joe Smith, 6-5, Southern Yukon Community College, Age 26.

Joe was a walkon at Southern Yukon and shoots well from the floor. While working at a car wash in Fargo, Joe's $500 dollar tryout fee check did not bounce.

[besl]

Now, now... Let's cut ol' Burrel Lee some slack. He can't possibly be expected to have time to check the grammar of his press releases with his busy schedule of coaching/owning the Buzz along with his full-time job of being a janitor at a Carson-area rec center.

[Paul S]

Maywood's first game will be against the Detroit Dumpster-Divers.

Dozens of fans will show up to see the Buzz vs the Dumpster-Divers only to find the doors locked, a small 'sign' on the door (ok a napkin that someone has scribbled on with a bic pen) saying the game is cancelled.

The arena says call the team for refunds, the teams phone number will be disconnected, the website will say "check back soon for exciting fast paced, family friendly basketball"

[ABARedWhiteBlue]

The Arkansas Fantastics!

ARKANSAS FANTASTICS ANNOUNCE FIRST TRYOUT CAMP

15-Aug-2007
Stuttgart, AR -- The Arkansas Fantastics will have open tryouts on September 15th at the Stuttgart High School Gym in Stuttgart, Arkansas. The Fantastics is currently Arkansas' only ABA team this season and are scheduled to play games throughout the state. The Registration Fee for the tryout is $100. The late registration fee is $125. Hotel accommodations are available at discounted rates for out-of-town players.

"The Fantastics are excited about this basketball season," stated Furonda Brasfield, team owner. "Although we already have some very talented players lined up, we are exciting about opening the team up to local talent and hope that we have a large turnout. There are some great players in Arkansas as the records showed last season."

The Arkansas Fantastics tryouts are open events that are free to the media and general public.

What: Arkansas Fantastics Open Tryouts
When: September 15th from 10 am - 6 pm
Where: Stuttgart High School, 401 West 22nd Street, Stuttgart, AR 72160

Interested players should call the team's management office at (877) 571-1604 or email arkansasfantastics@yahoo.com.

http://www.abalive.com/news/releases/?n ... 7081506003

BTW, a Yahoo mail address? Why not an address through your website? Hear's why:
http://www.arkansasfantastics.com/ = This site is under construction.

Might want to get that site up pretty soon...

[ABARedWhiteBlue]

Hey, here's Hawaii!

HURRICANES SHAKE THE GYM IN FIRST TRYOUT

14-Aug-2007
Honolulu, HI -- There were plenty of rim-rattling highlights from the ABA Hawaii Hurricanes first ever tryout on Saturday at Kalaheo High School's gym. Familiar faces and wandering free agents displayed their skills, personalities and endurance hoping to impress head coach Alika smith, assistants Darrell Matsui and Scott Kato and owner Andrew Moss.

Hawaii's best amateurs, recent collegiate players and semi-professionals were joined by some former Hawaii Mega Force players. Those in the gym exuded their confidence in the future and current success of the Hurricanes. Kaunaoa McGee, a powerful multi-skilled guard who also made the previous Mega Force roster, thanks that the new team will stay in Hawaii for a long time.

"The previous owner never took action. He was a great guy but just didn't have good help. He kept making promises to the players but never came through. I feel a lot better knowing that Andrew Moss already has some sponsors and that we'll be playing at the Blaisdell. There are people and businesses here that want to support basketball, but haven't been given a valid opportunity until now."

The Neal Blaisdell Arena has recently installed a brand new comfortable new arena seating throughtout its lower 2300 plus seats. The Hurricanes first home game is scheduled for November 11th when the Maywood Buzz come to visit for two games. Before then, the Arena will have completed the installation of a brand new air conditioning system, basketball court and goals.

In an afternoon of exciting tryout action, the most notable surprise of the day came from unknown Travis Gale. The 6'6" swingman from New Jersey showed remarkable spped and quickness to go with shut down defense and consistent shot making. He was one of many who gave great demanding efforts.

As tryout were being conducted, ABA Director of Officials, Tom Chichester was educating, training and evaluating at least nine local veteran referees. He told those in attendance about the ABA's exciting, fast-paced brand of basketball and why it continues to be a successful innovator for professional leagues around the world.

The first signings will not be announced until after the Las Vegas tryouts on September 8th and 9th, but according to Andrew Moss, team owner, "We have great players here and truly believe that several will make the squad. There's some great talent in Hawaii."

Thanks to local sponsor Aqua Hotels and Resorts, and their ten boutique properties in Waikiki, the Hurricanes can comfortably house teams in Hawaii throughout the course of the 36 game season. The tone of the tryouts was competitive but friendly. "Day one certainly started us off right. We're looking for a terrific season," added Moss.

For more information, email andrew_moss@hawaiihurricanes.com or visit http://www.hawaiihurricanes.com.

Taken word for word from ABAlive - http://www.abalive.com/news/releases/?n ... 7081406002

Just wondering -
- Are "wandering free agents" a good thing or a bad thing?
- What, exactly are "great demanding efforts" and how does one give them?
- "Those in the gym exuded their confidence in the future and current success of the Hurricanes" - I think Chris and Chuck will back me on this, but there is no reason to use a $1 word (exuded) where a 25 cent word will do (and, I'm not even sure it is used properly here anyway).
- "The Neal Blaisdell Arena has recently installed a brand new comfortable new arena seating throughtout its lower 2300 plus seats." Ugh...

The Corning landscaper sure gets around doesnt he?

Also interesting is the level of disdain for the former franchise and owner in this team release. Don't soil where you sleep; if you fail to meet the minimum requirements thi season, the Hurricanes are no better than the Mega Force.

[Chuck the Writer]

[quote=""ABARedWhiteBlue""]"Those in the gym exuded their confidence in the future and current success of the Hurricanes" - I think Chris and Chuck will back me on this, but there is no reason to use a $1 word (exuded) where a 25 cent word will do (and, I'm not even sure it is used properly here anyway).[/quote]

I remember attending classes with a college professor who actually lowered grades on term papers if the word "utilize" appeared anywhere in the text. He always said "Never utilize 'utilize' when you can use 'use.'" He also got on the case of one student whose term paper had this sentence - "Usually these things get off to an unusual start." That was freshman year, and I still heard about it from him at my 20th reunion!

All this press release shows is that whoever wrote it tried to pad the press release with puffery and flowery language. Sort of like reupholstering a couch by stuffing it with horse manure. Press releases like the ones extruded from most ABA teams are trying to out-shine the competition by showing how much of the dictionary they can cram into their public statements. Woo freakin hoo.

But then, what would you expect from a glorified strat-o-matic rec league like the ABA. Lindsay Lohan would win an Oscar before the ABA ever reached any respectable level of credibility.

[notfunny]

[quote=""ABARedWhiteBlue""] Why not an address through your website? Hear's why:[/quote]

Please tell me you did that on purpose...

[notfunny]

[quote=""Paul S""] (ok a napkin that someone has scribbled on with a bic pen) [/quote]

Did that actually happen or are you making **** up?

[ABARedWhiteBlue]

[quote=""notfunny""]Please tell me you did that on purpose...[/quote]

Sort of.

I actually had a few grammar-challenged words/phrases I was using, but didn't like the look, so I changed my mind. One got through, however.