WHAFAN
04-04-2007, 04:31 PM
Just a few ideas that came to mind when I was pondering how to cut costs for the league.
-Raise the baskets to 13 feet. You will save money on basketballs by them not wearing out due the friction of the nylon netting.
-Duct tape numbers on jerseys instead of masking tape. Duct tape would hold up to the washing machine more than standard masking tape. Plus, it is available in many colors.
-Fill out the online surveys you get in emails. You can get samples of laundry soap and shampoo. When the so called team bus pulls into the fillin' station, players could wash their uniforms and their hair in the bathroom sink.
-On off days, players could wander the streets looking for aluminum cans for recycling. I believe 45 cans make a pound which goes for .35.
-Stop teams from visiting old folks homes and nursing homes. By the time the team websites are updated with game dates and times, these old folks will be 6 feet under.
-Eliminate all dance teams. Teams with less fans in the stands than dance team members should not offer free entertainment. Unless of course, there is the ever popular " No Panty Cartwheel Night"
-Any member of this debacle who mentions the ABA of the 70's would be made to clean up the non-regulation sized gym after home games. This would save owners money on gym rental. Wait, that means this guy would have to pick up 3 potato chip bags, stack 6 folding chairs, and shut the lights off on the way out. Nevermind.
-A huge money maker at ALL teams opening night would be the Joe Newman Replica Toupee Night. All fans 2 and over would receive an authentic Joe Newman toupee, compliments of Chia Pet. This would pack 'em in!! Attendance could reach triple digits !!
-Raise the baskets to 13 feet. You will save money on basketballs by them not wearing out due the friction of the nylon netting.
-Duct tape numbers on jerseys instead of masking tape. Duct tape would hold up to the washing machine more than standard masking tape. Plus, it is available in many colors.
-Fill out the online surveys you get in emails. You can get samples of laundry soap and shampoo. When the so called team bus pulls into the fillin' station, players could wash their uniforms and their hair in the bathroom sink.
-On off days, players could wander the streets looking for aluminum cans for recycling. I believe 45 cans make a pound which goes for .35.
-Stop teams from visiting old folks homes and nursing homes. By the time the team websites are updated with game dates and times, these old folks will be 6 feet under.
-Eliminate all dance teams. Teams with less fans in the stands than dance team members should not offer free entertainment. Unless of course, there is the ever popular " No Panty Cartwheel Night"
-Any member of this debacle who mentions the ABA of the 70's would be made to clean up the non-regulation sized gym after home games. This would save owners money on gym rental. Wait, that means this guy would have to pick up 3 potato chip bags, stack 6 folding chairs, and shut the lights off on the way out. Nevermind.
-A huge money maker at ALL teams opening night would be the Joe Newman Replica Toupee Night. All fans 2 and over would receive an authentic Joe Newman toupee, compliments of Chia Pet. This would pack 'em in!! Attendance could reach triple digits !!